Top 10 Worst Fight Songs | The Shark Guys

April 12, 2010 | lists,music

In the fight game, just like the bedroom, it’s important to get off first. This is true whether you’re facing a champ who’ll later make you have bowel movements that look like V8 or, a ‘tomato can’, fight parlance for a heavy bag with feet.

While that old ‘getting off first’ fight maxim may be true, the actual fight actually begins long before the mafia has been consulted, illegal satellite hook ups are rigged and the combatants take to the squared circle: it begins backstage, as the fighters are being introduced.

Important entrance music is key. Triple H uses Motorhead and not the Blue Danube Waltz and in a sport where the outcome is often slightly less premeditated, boxing, Mike Tyson would come in to Time for some Action by Redman and not She’ll be Coming Around the Mountain when She Comes.

Pretty Boy Floyd baits Mexican fans with sombrero

Similarly, in MMA, where they apply moves like a ‘guillotine’, designed to cut off oxygen to the brain that if applied for too long, would turn registered republicans into Tea Party supporters, they look for music that is intimidating and gets the crowd even more fired up than the realization they bet on the wrong guy earlier in the evening and will have to drown their sorrows with booze and increasing violence.

In the UFC, fighters will march into the ring to tunes like God’s Gonna Cut you Down or Many Men by 50 Cent. Former math teacher Rich ‘Ace’ Franklin (we’ll tackle horrible nicknames another time) will knock quadratic equations into his opponents after the strains of For Those About to Rock deafen ears; Former wrestling Olympian Dan Henderson’s choice of Lunatic Fringe conveys that he means business while meathead WWE grappler Brock Lesnar intimidates with Shout at the Devil. There are some songs though, that are best left to the confetti and desperation that is the wedding DJ circuit. Here then are our Top 10 Worst Fights Songs to be used as entrance music.

10. Please help me I’m falling (Hank Locklin)

Choice Lyrics:

I can never be free dear, but when I’m with you I know that I’m losing the will to be true.

9. Why Can’t We be Friends (War)

Choice Lyrics:

The title, pretty much over and over again. Song was used by the Brick Hit House Homer J Simpson when he took on Drederick Tatum