November 10, 2009 | lists

It’s easy to feel acrimonious toward something that along with those torrent sites and the passage of time made your entire CD collection redundant, but at the end of the day, Youtube is a valuable forum for listening to music you would’ve previously had to pay for.

While some lament exorbitant personal expenditures on music collections—funds that could’ve put you in a third-tier community college or a suit at the last funeral you attended—you can’t put a price on Chinese Backstreet Boys, or Karaoke Fail (unless you’re an economist measuring workplace productivity).

Those same economists may say there’s no thing as a free lunch, but Youtube is as close as you can get to free entertainment without hairy palms and yet, millions abuse such a privilege wrangling about whether Glee’s Don’t Stop Believing usurps the original, the late MJ was a pederast or if Metallica has sold out (when it’s best to leave things be with a ‘no’, ‘we’ll never know’ and ‘most definitely yes’, respectively).

Certain uploads though, practically invite criticism and commentary: whether it’s someone’s take on  Biggie Small’s ‘Who Shot Ya?’ accompanied on harmonica or a backyard brawler leaving his left hand noticeably low (and  then feeling the need to speculate about how a human face has much less give than a heavy bag). Still, it’s too bad that more comments aren’t vetted or more accurately, that more people aren’t possessed with critical thinking faculties or a functional link to dictionary.com.

As daily addicts,  we’ve decided to compile some of the worst offenders here in our list of the Top 20 Annoying Comments on Youtube.

1. Discussing the legacy of the German Imperial War Council of 1912 or  how Hannibal could’ve bested the Romans in the Second Punic War,  particularly annoying in the context of a Taylor Swift video with Def Leppard.

2. The presence of the terms ‘epic, pwn, or fail’, low-tide as far as brainwaves are concerned.

3. Pointing out how ____________ is ‘real music’, whilst all other stuff is crap.

4…and if it’s crap….the inevitable ‘why are you watching/listening to this crap if you don’t like it?’ rebuttal

5. Loosers (sic)

6. Ur hot.

7. Something disparaging about blacks or Jews, written by people whose brains should be donated to science—now, rather than posthumously.

8. How  rock music is real music and hip hop isn’t (interestingly, the reverse rarely happens as perhaps fans of rap aren’t as musically conservative)

9. To all you haters out there (insert misspelled expletive here)

10. If you like this, check out my (most certainly and unfailingly awful) band __________________.

11. ALL CAPS  JERKOFFS!

12. Only 100 more views and we reach 72,000!

13. Stupid WMG! (How dare Warner Music Group remove content that they own from a popular website?)

14. Gay.

15.  Does anyone know who plays bass on this? (GOOGLE!)

16. °º¤ø„¸ ¸„ø¤º°¨¸„ø¤º°¨
¨°º¤ø„ _PS3_ „ø¤º°¨ If you agree
¸„ø¤º°¨RULEZ!!!“°º¤ø„¸copy and paste

17. The complete absence of apostrophes.

18. Denigrating the US. Americans are so terrible and I’m going to let everyone know it on this, a site developed in the US and run by a company based in California.

19. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

20. Your dumb. (My dumb what?)