August 12, 2009 | Mad Science
Status Update: Currently writing a blog post about Facebook
The internet has given those in the social sciences a new lease on life. After decades spent recording how men react when the guy in the next urinal brings up the weather, they can now suss out how just out how social media affects human behavior. This has led to countless studies with a firmer grasp on the obvious than guys lugging around a heavy sign that says ‘obvious’. The latest research is from the University of Guelph and was picked up like a communicable disease from a toilet seat by numerous media outlets including the LA Times. This was because it contained the term ‘Facebook’ and with sinking ad revenues, mainstream media like their easy keyword hits as much as we do.
Facebook is where you post pictures of yourself that would not be seen by most of the people on your friends list unless you held a slideshow in your living room – and invited the kid who ate grass by the clump in second grade – or an interested party hired by a private investigator. All sorts of information is posted on Facebook and – depending on the time you devote to posting and the inclination of the reader to wade through the up-to-the-minute updates of the latest things you’ve ingested – the community of those who know you intimately increases from coworkers at the local Stop N’ Gobble to a huge pool of people, some of whom you may never have met in the humans sharing oxygen in the same space sort of sense.
Facebook features messaging, invites, quizzes, games, wall graffiti and countless other annoying features so it’s not surprising that with such a high degree of user participation, people socialize through Facebook more than they would back in the days of a phonebook and a quarter to call someone who cares.
Is it surprising to anyone – other than the researchers involved and editors of an embarrassingly large number of media outlets – that Facebook can lead to jealousy? Prior to Facebook, your main competition would be everyone in your immediate circle of friends who your partner has probably already ruled out in the process of settling for you. In the post-Facebook age, the competition spikes dramatically – with every “poking” SOB on there a potential mate-thief.
Threatened partners, say researchers, tend to watch Facebook like they would the heart monitor of a close rich and utterly despised relative – any movement is bad news. The Times takes the pains to point out that “the bouts of escalating jealousy, say the researchers, cannot be good for a relationship.”
The “study” focused on college students, but researchers say with the scientific surety that gives people faith in social sciences, “Facebook might unleash the same dynamics in adult relationships.”
But remember: just because you scour your significant other’s Facebook page every 15 minutes (and sporadically throughout the night in response to pre-set alarms) for any hint of a burgeoning dalliance or affection directed anywhere other than towards you to the exclusion of all other human beings, does not mean that there isn’t someone out there looking to cut your lunch.
[For those interested in other examples of junk science we've covered, click here]
